I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
