So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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