I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
