So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
You made out with two different species that night
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
