I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize