I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Randomize
