I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Randomize
