that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
