They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
He? As in you personified your dick?
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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