Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
operation harelip BJ is a go
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
