now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
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