check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
