ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
