In the future we'll all be gay
Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Randomize