I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
