A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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