your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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