make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
How does one acquire holy water?
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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