I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
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