Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
The dick lei will go down in squad history
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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