Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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