the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
