Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
We're not piercing ourselves today.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
