my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
