Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
