I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I love you.
Bad choice
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