the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Randomize