my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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