I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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