Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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