Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
