Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
