Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
