Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Randomize
