your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
