I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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