He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
