do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
