I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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