trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
