I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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