do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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