she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize
