Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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