apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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