I bet he comes in French.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
