Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Randomize
