Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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