You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
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