You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
