tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
